Reflections On This Day

Perhaps if we didn't have a child, we would have watched more of the memorials to 9/11 this morning. At least I would have. But those images of that day are hard enough to explain to a five year-old on a normal day. But when emotions that come with anniversaries of such events are so raw, it becomes even more challenging. A tearful or shaky delivery would be quite unsettling for a child and might create a vivid memory in them you'd prefer they didn't have.

The day will come when the boy will put two and two together and realize that his father and mother were there. That his mother was only two blocks away. The day will come when he will read the journals that both of us wrote in the days after.

But not this morning.

This morning, the boy asked to watch a "reflection", as he calls episodes of series, from the DVD set of the  first season of Batman, The Animated Series. I was relieved.

It just so happens that what came up in the rotation of reflections was the first part of the origin story of "Two-Face." Admittedly, I was a little worried about him watching these but, so far, the series had handled their plots so subtly and deftly that I figured we'd be okay.

In case you didn't know, the origin story of Two Face, as told by the series, is that District Attorney, Harvey Dent, is a successful and driven politician. He is also a do-gooder through and through who is dedicated to eradicating crime in Gotham. He is also a close personal friend of Bruce Wayne. In this version, Harvey suffers from split personality disorder which is coming to the surface due to several pressures in his life. The disorder is a result of guilt and repression of rage from childhood. At the end of the first part, half of Dent's face is severely disfigured in an explosion during a showdown with the bad guys. Batman rescues the unconscious Harvey and takes him to the hospital. Upon seeing his new appearance, Dent suffers a psychotic break and the villain Two Face is born.

Not exactly the stuff of a childrens cartoon but, as I said, the production team is quite skilled. The psychotic break is something an adult can infer. The child just knows he's angry. And, as opposed to the more realistic disfigurement in the movie, "The Dark Knight", the damaged side of Harvey's face resembles a blue, qrotesque kabuki mask. The boy has seen worse on cartoons geared toward much younger children.

Even so, he was troubled by the cliffhanger and asked if we could watch the next reflection. Even though I knew it wouldn't be a completely happy ending, I knew that Batman would deal with his friend turned foe with compassion.

We watched the second half.

There was a great deal of pressing the pause button as I answered the boy's questions. He couldn't figure out why Harvey didn't trust and was even mad at his girlfriend. I explained that he couldn't believe that she or anybody could love him because of the way he looked and acted. But she did. He kept asking if Harvey was a good guy or a bad guy. I told him he wishes he could be a good guy but he is just so angry that he is having trouble. One second he does something bad, but then I pointed out when he saved his girlfriend and Batman as a moment when he was good. I finally told him that if he was feeling confused, he should understand that Harvey is feeling confused too.

In the end, Batman saves Harvey from himself for the present. As Harvey is being taken away, Batman expresses a hope that his friend will get better, but there are no guarantees.  I was prepared for this. I know the Batman stories even if I didn't know this particular version.

Even though the boy has seen more violent things on television--things he mostly saw by accident--he was particularly concerned by the ending of this show. As soon as the credits were over he quietly asked again, "So is Harvey a good guy or a bad guy?" I told him again that he wants to be a good guy but he might end up being a bad guy. At this point, I was about to decide I really screwed up and that I shouldn't have let him watch these reflections.

Then the boy quietly uttered, "I think he's a good guy." I responded with what felt like the most right thing I said all morning, "Well then that makes you like Batman. He believes Harvey's a good guy too, and he's not going to give up on him."

He thought about this for a moment then smiled huge and raised his hands above his head in triumph.

I am aware that he will learn more about Two Face in time. And some of it will disappoint him. But just like the end of the reflection today, those days will take care of themselves.

I'm rehearsing right now with a director whose process I particularly enjoy. He is very careful to make artistic choices that suggest rather than instruct. In other words, he doesn't beat you over the head with a point or moral. He takes risks, provokes thought and allows the audience to come to their own conclusions without presenting images or interpretations that are too "on the nose."

I didn't know how I would spend the 10th anniversary of 9/11 with my five year-old son. I knew I didn't want to spend it the way I'd spent many of the other anniversaries. Admittedly, I felt guilty about not watching any of the memorials.

I don't feel that way anymore.